Friday, September 7, 2012

Nadir



How do I even begin to start telling you about the past however many months it is now that we’ve been back in the good ‘ol state of Illinois? I guess the best place to start is where every good story starts: at the beginning. The beginning of 2012 started out like any other crazy year we’ve had since being married. I was working full time, Jarrod was working, and little Jesalyn was in day care. We were in Nashville, the place we so desperately wanted to get back to after moving away for a year and half. Life wasn’t perfect, but we were doing it. Living the dream, also known as scrapping by, paycheck to paycheck, but we were doing it without help from anyone but ourselves. As the months went on, our precious little savings account started to dwindle, but we were determined to stick it out. Something would come along, we told ourselves. I was really hoping for a promotion at work, one that, in my opinion should have already been given to me. I had had a few interviews and just knew it was in the cards for me.

I got passed up for one job, and then another. And then, I had heard through the grapevine that I was about to be offered a job only to find out a week later that due to “reconsolidation” they had to give the job to someone else, but “not to worry, you’ll for sure get the next one!” Not only did I not get the next one, but there were some upper management changes and I got stuck with a jerk-butt for a corporate boss. Over the next couple of months, my self esteem at work went from a 10 to about a (-)5. I never, in a million years, would have imagined the situation that I found myself in. I loved my job. Of course, there was corporate junk that you have to deal with in every position, but I thoroughly enjoyed coming to work. I was consistently one of the few on top in sales and felt good about what I did. And then, as fast as a storm blows in, everything changed. I won’t bother you with the mumbo jumbo of it all, but to put it in simple terms, the company changed the way we did things. The change was disastrous. Not one employee enjoyed it, and it was really hard to incorporate into our daily routine. But we tried. We tried really hard. I am the type of person, that if you want me to change the way I do something, I need to understand it. Understand it, work with it, and mold it into something I can realistically do on a daily basis. This did. Not. Work. The company I worked for was big, and it was “do it our way, or there is the door.” I was trying to do it “their” way, but I had to make it fit me for it to be a normal daily task.

Anyway!!

So, all this to say, some words were said, some coaching was done, and I came to work and cried for about 2weeks straight. The final straw came when a man, three bosses up, came to my office and reprimanded me until I was crying, yet again. But this time, there were co-workers and customers looking in on what was happening. After he left, unblocking my doorway, I decided that I could no longer do it. This company that I had worked at for 6 years didn’t care a lick about me. And looking at myself, I did not like who I had become. I had always enjoyed work. Enjoyed the feeling of accomplishment when I did something right, and the joy of moving up in a company. This is not who I was anymore. I went home and talked to Jarrod and we decided then and there that we were done. We would move, yet again.

My sister lives in Paducah, and after visiting, we decided that we really kind of liked the quaint town (with the 2nd best coffee shop I have ever been too. The first being the one I worked at in college.) I applied for a job, with a different company of course, and made it to the 2nd interview. I was feeling really good about it. I started to see the light at the end of tunnel and then I got the call. They offered the job to an internal candidate, but to “keep applying because I was the next choice and would be a very valuable asset to their company.” All I heard was “thanks, but no thanks”

We went through all of our options and the one we kept coming back to involved us moving back home where we both grew up. I tiny little town in Illinois. We had family there, a support group of sort. I knew I could not keep working the same job, our savings account was slowing disintegrating, we had always talked about moving back anyway when Jesalyn started kindergarten, and wouldn’t you know it, our lease was about to expire. It was now or never. All the pieces added up. The only thing missing was jobs. Neither one of us had one and we knew with what we had saved we couldn’t last more than about 4 months. After lots of conversation, tears(all from me of course), and praying, we decided to take a leap and do it. It was the only thing that made sense, even without the jobs. We applied for jobs and about two weeks before moving day Jarrod was offered a job. The only stipulation being he had to be there in three days. This meant, leaving me and Jesalyn in Tennessee to pack up an entire apartment and move by ourselves. It was time to put on the big girl panties….or call mom =)

My mom came down and pretty much packed up my entire apartment while I worked, and literally on the drive back I got a call and was offered a job. So now we both had jobs lined up. Now all we needed was a place to stay…..but I’ll leave that for chapter 2 =)



Thanks for reading……

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